Friday, 17 March 2017

I WISH I HAD A WILLY

I Wish I had a Willy!

written by: J.Ahlberg
@anothermadidea

If I only had a penis I could take it around with me
I’d get much more respect with an erect accessory.
It wouldn’t have to be that big, a little prick would do
A flashy sports car would extend it if it needs me to.
When the kids are needy, I’ll just point to it and say
“Sorry, I can’t help, because my dangler is in the way!”
While wife takes care of business at home for little praise
I’ll take my joystick out and get another big bucks raise.
When my work is mediocre I’ll wave wand above my head
And ping, just like magic, it'll all seem fantastic instead.
Mr. Johnson will say “what an anal achievement it is!”
Cos I’ll push and prod the prudes aside with it in my fist.
I’ll polish, pet and talk to it, and tell it tales about its greatness
For because of it I’ll be shameless and quite (woe)manly famous.
If I had a shaft, I'd sing excuses through my skin flute
And sugarcoat my lies in testosterone and a stripy suit.
Let’s face it; having a knob is all that really matters
A willy, a wanker, a weeny peeny teeny tally whacker.

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